1.07.2013

{on femininity}

So, here's a non-secret. I like pink. And bows. And dresses with ruffles. I'm girly and giggly and feminine, and I've always considered it to be a non-issue. I mean, without getting into the whole feminists vs. the world argument, I'm a little confused these days as to why my "style" is suddenly controversial. 

Lost? This article (and this post and this one) got me thinking. Regardless of whether or not you like Zooey Deschanel, she definitely has a style and a brand. I don't know that I copy her, or anyone else for that matter. This past year, I've developed my own tastes and style to a point where I've had friends recognize me from far away because of my high bun and/or bows. These things make me happy and feel comfortable. That shouldn't be a bad thing, should it?

But, I want to know your opinion. Do you think girls dressing this way is a negative thing? I've heard a lot of negative comments lately about it, though not necessarily directed at me. I can say, however, that the confidence I get from truly being me far outweighs any negative impression that others may get. 
I wear pearls and high heels and pencil skirts on a regular basis. But I'm also a strong businesswoman with a mind of her own. Would you think less of me if you saw me on the street wearing a bow in my hair?

Disclaimer: I'm not writing this post to stir a pot or be controversial in any way. I'm not angry or annoyed, I just want to see what others think on the topic.

30 comments:

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Feminism is the concept that women deserve the same rights as men. I really don't understand how a hair bow could indicate how you feel on the issue.

Anyone who takes issue with the fact that you are a strong successful woman who chooses to dress in a conventionally feminine or 'girly' way probably isn't a feminist. They may be the opposite. Femininity does not denote weakness, and it isn't belittling of a woman to choose to dress herself in this way. As a feminist, I think you have license to dress however the hell you want - take pride in it, and don't ever let anyone make you feel like showing your feminine side is a weakness.

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Who cares!? I don't care. Be yourself. Being girly shouldn't be offensive to feminists. I don't think anyone talking about women and how they look or dress can possibly be a feminist!? Come on people! I think having personal style is really important and it's great you have such a defined one :)

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Oh, I'm all about pearls and heels... and pink! I love being feminine and I'm proud of it. :)

http://shannonhearts.blogspot.com

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

I'm glad that you brought this up. This whole point of view drives me crazy. So I like to wear bows and pearls ... that doesn't mean I'm unprofessional or anti-feminist or doing a disservice to women. rock those bows, girl!

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

I agree with everyone here. You should wear what you love and not be victimized for it. I love being girly, I infact want to embrace it more this year!

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

I love being girly, but I also want to earn my PhD someday. Girls should feel free to dress however they darn well please!

http://tinyurl.com/a975egm
Straight up, yo.


-Lindsey
http://ettu-tutu.blogspot.com

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

i think women should dress however they want -- i think we are the most beautiful when wearing something that we are comfortable in as opposed to something we think looks good but doesn't necessarily feel good. :)

<3, Mimi

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

I think you should dress however you like. It's like the big fuss some people are making about women cursing. Like it is some abomination that women use curse words. That it somehow makes us less lady-like and disgusting. Everyone will have their own opinion... as long as you are happy and confident about who you are and how you present yourself the rest is just nonsense!

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

I dress very similarly, so I completely understand. I think partly why I could "get away" with wearing a tutu if i wanted is because I'm only 21. Everyone i work with is a lot older than me. I think if I were 25 or older people would stare at me like I was playing dress up. Regardless, I'll always love to dress girly :)

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Honetly I hate femenist, I think back then their idea and logic were great! But now the groups get too carried away and get mad at every little thing that they think might be degrading...

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

I love dressing up and being girly! I think that it's important for women to be strong and independent, but that doesn't mean you can't enjoy being girly as well.


xoxo Miss ALK

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Just because I'm a feminist doesn't mean that I have to wear pant suits! To me, feminism isn't about NOT wanting to be lady-like or girly! It's about being free to be whoever we want to be without any societal pressure or generalizations. Love you and your style, lady!

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

I don't see anything wrong with it at all! I'm quite a bit of a tomboy, but I still dress up in heels, pearls, and a dress for church every Sunday. And I love it. I think we should be able to wear whatever the Hell we want without anyone questioning our motives.

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Ditto!!

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

I'm with you lady! I loooove being a girly girl. And Zooey, she is definitely a girl after my own heart!!
Here's what I think, dress how you want to because it makes YOU happy. That goes for everyone. The thing is, you will always be judged by someone - and that's life.

Three cheers for independent ladies all around the world, however you dress!
xx -b.

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

I think you're right Brittany ;) I definitely am not going to stop dressing the way I do, just because someone else doesn't like it. It's part of me, and I kind of love me :) xoxo

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Right?! It makes me happy to know that I'm not the only one who feels this way ;)

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

I'm definitely a feminist as well, and I've never thought that the way I dress would become an issue...but it is! I think that feminists in general are losing sight of what's really important these days, and that makes me sad...

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Thank you! This is exactly how I feel :)

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

I consider myself a feminist, but in the purest sense of the word. I think that there are some very radical feminists that are redefining the word, and that makes me really sad. Being a feminist, in my mind, is about choice, and I choose to be girly and pretty!

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Ha. I'm 25 ;) But I try not to take it too far. Not on a regular basis, at least...

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Thanks lady! That's pretty much how I feel. I am who I am, and it's nobody's place to judge me! Unfortunately, not everyone feels that way...

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Exactly! I agree...what's most important is that we're comfortable with ourselves, regardless of how we dress!

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Ha, I love it.


You're so right...I really shouldn't care what anyone else thinks ;)

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Love it! I just have a very feminine style, though it may not be for everyone ;) xoxo

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Thanks lady! It's really good to hear that I'm not the only one who feels this way...we're amazing ladies, and it shouldn't matter what people think about what I wear!

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Love it! I love your style Shannon!

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

Haha right?! I don't particularly care, but I wanted to see if I was just going crazy...or if people actually think these things. To me, feminism is all about letting women be who they are, and this is who I am! I love having a distinct style too! I shouldn't have to give that up ;)

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

I consider myself a feminist, so I definitely what you mean. I have my own definition on the word, but it all comes down to choice for me, and letting women make their own decisions without restrictions because of gender, etc. It just makes me really sad when I see articles or people who bash girly girls because we're somehow degrading women, or regressing back to some other, less equal time. I like hair bows! Why does it matter?

Joelle :: Something Charming said...

There's no shame in being a girly girl, at least in my opinion. I wear pearls almost every day (even wearing them now), and I think that feeling feminine is just a simple form of happiness for many women.
P.S. I got that book for Xmas and have yet to open it! Shame on me!