5.02.2011

It's Called "The Quarter-Life Crisis"

I had a little bit of a meltdown today. I'm okay now; I usually feel better as soon as I start writing down the steps I need to take to get to the next part of my life.

I'm sure that there are plenty of others out there who probably feel the exact same way that I do. Actually, I know that there are a lot of you out there, since you told me in the comments of that post. Just knowing that I'm not the only one going through this is a relief {not that I wish this upon anyone}.

One of my very dear readers from Twenty Something Blonde left me the sweetest comment today. It was so very kind and heartfelt and encouraging, and it definitely helped to bring me out of my funk a bit. She also sent me a link to her post about what they call "The Quarter-Life Crisis."

I wanted to share this with all of you. Maybe it will make you feel a little bit better too.

Being Twenty-Something

They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis."
It is when you stop going along with the crowd
and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know
and may not like.

You start feeling insecure
and wonder where you will be in a year or two,
but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish
and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to
aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met.

And the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones.
What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too-
and aren't really cold, catty, meanor insincere-
but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job- and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing.
Or maybe you are looking for a job
and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom
and that scares you.

Your opinions have gotten stronger
You see what others are doing
and find yourself judging more than usual
because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life
and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable
and what isn't.

One minute, you are insecure
and then the next, secure.
You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life.
You feel alone
and scared
and confused

Suddenly, change is the enemy
and you try and cling on to the past with dear life,
but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away.
And there is nothing to do but stay where you are
or move forward

You get your heart broken
and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you.
Or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough
that you want to get to know better.
Or maybe you love someone
but love someone else too
and cannot figure out why you are doing this
because you know that you aren't a bad person.

One-night-stands and random hook ups start to look cheap.
Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic.

You go through the same emotions and questions over and over,
and talk with your friends about the same topics
because you cannot seem to make a decision.
You worry about loans, money, the future
and making a life for yourself.
And while winning the race would be great,
right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it.
We are in our best of times and our worst of times,
trying as hard as we can
to figure this whole thing out.

xoxo,

16 comments:

Erin said...

I needed this tonight. Thank you for posting this. I think it's amazing and I'm sorry you are struggling today. I'll be praying for you friend.

Love and Hugs,
Erin

Liv Szari said...

I stumbled upon your blog and love it! This post is great, feels so good to know others are going through the same tough stuff!

P.S. Here's to being young and married =)

JessRaquel said...

I needed this in the worst way. This is exactly how I feel right now, I'm hitting my Quarter Life Crisis. Glad to know that I'm not alone.

writingthislife.com said...

Agreed to all of the above. Much.needed.read. Thank you!

-Anna @ www.writingthislife.com

Kaitlyn Thatcher said...

OMGSH thank you for posting this! This describes how I'm feeling right now too so much better than I ever could have put it! And it does feel so good to know that I'm not the only one feeling like this.

Rebecca said...

Like others have said before me, this resonates with just about everything I've been feeling lately. After a bit of a "strop" that I had last night, this was just what I needed to read this morning ^_^ 20 Somethings, we're all in this together, right?

Holley said...

I love this! Thanks for posting it. It's good to know we aren't alone.

Amanda said...

That was fantastic! And beyond relatable. Thank you for sharing that with us! I hope today is looking up for you!

Kristina said...

Thank you for posting this. I love it. I needed it, in fact.

Miranda Hartrampf said...

i LOVED reading that! thank you

aj said...

Perfect. Honestly.

This is me, right now.

Thanks.

<3
aj

Alisha said...

Geeze, who ever said teens are the worst years of your life was sadly mistaken. Your twenties are by the worst. You're still learning so much about yourself, and you HAVE to be independent. You have struggle. You have to learn. But, in the end, we all WILL survive.

Keep your head up, pretty girl!

xoxo

Ashley said...

Hey Joelle,

Here's a link to a book I read senior year of college that really helped me cope with the impending "Quarterlife Crisis":http://www.amazon.com/Conquering-Your-Quarterlife-Crisis-Twentysomethings/dp/039953038X

Also, a really great article I found from a friend a couple weeks back: http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/whole-life/features/22864-what-to-know-when-youre-25ish

When all else fails, count your blessings.

Love to you!
Ash

jillian :: cornflake dreams. said...

well said. i would say that i am v happy with how things in my life are turning out.. i am SO grateful for the friends and family i have and i cant wait for even more happy times in the future. of course theres a few downs with the ups but i think its better to be optimistic and surround yourself around positive people who will love and support you. and i fully intend on doing that! xoxo jillian

Amanda said...

This made me tear up a little bit. It's so true! Thank you for posting this. It's reassuring (in a weird way) to know that I'm not alone.

xox

nunyabiz said...

I wouldn't wish this feeling on anyone either. Thank you!