3.17.2011

Call Me Crazy...

I think I might do something crazy soon.

Facebook.

I love/hate relationship with the damn thing.

I love that I can stay in contact with family and friends that I don't normally talk to; that I can stalk see what people are up to in a completely legal way. I can post pictures for my mom to see, and I can promote my blog.

But people annoy me. This is not news.

Granted, my automatic linking from Bloglovin to Facebook has probably caused the removal of my Facebook activity from the newsfeed of some "friends", if they haven't removed me from their precious list of friends completely. But in all honesty, if I haven't noticed that I am no longer their friend, we probably weren't very good friends in the first place.

I cringe when I wake up on a holiday and realize that I'll have to wade through countless amounts of Happy {insert holiday here}, as if wishing all of your 1,397 friends via status update really means something to any of them. I have been known to delete anybody from my own friends list if they tend to post any type of extreme political opinion, from either side of the debate. But the worst, for some strange reason, is the weather.

Really?

"Dear rain. I hate you. Please go away and never come back. Love, Me"

Yes, it rains in California. It's also cold in the Midwest and snows in the Northeast. This is not news either.

I know a few people who have deleted their Facebook recently, for a variety of reasons. They spend too much time on it. They aren't maintaining true relationships with people. They get sad every time they see one of their friends get engaged.

I'm not sure that any of these reasons actually apply to me. I don't spend as much time on it as some people I know. They only people I *really* interact with on the site are the same ones I spend my actual time with. And I actually love the fact that I get to hear about engagements, marriages, and even the ocassional divorce, all while finding out what you ate for dinner or that you lost your cell phone.

My best friend deleted hers a few weeks ago, and she's still alive. Even the high schooler I tutor was thinking about deleting hers, in an attempt to focus on studying for her AP test. If a fifteen year old can do it, why can't I?

My husband thinks I'm crazy. Well, that's not entirely true, because I've really only mentioned it in passing. This post was my first real attempt at trying to figure out whether or not I really want to do it.

I could make a Facebook page for my blog, which I know that some people do. That way I can still use it to promote my blog. Or I could just delete every person that annoys me from my friends list. Or I can just delete it altogether and forget that Facebook ever existed.

Have any of you ever made such a drastic and life-changing decision? {<------ sarcasm}

Thanks for listening friends. Be sure to enter my giveaway if you haven't already. And visit my guest post. I promise you'll love it.

xoxo,

21 comments:

KT @ KT's Refinishing School said...

I've found that I am on Facebook way less than I used to be, mainly because most of my online reading is now in my Google Reader with blogs :)

I also like following blogs better than FB because you get a fuller story and there is more sharing than a one line status every once in a while or pictures with no captions on FB!

Betty said...

I'm about to shed some Facebook Friends. I like it to keep in touch with my family (parents, aunts, uncles, cousins) and IRL friends. It's great for sharing pics and just saying hi. Oh, and it helps me remember birthday cards! And in a family that avoids sharing any information ever, it occasionally fills me in on life. (I've learned of more than one death in the family via facebook.)

But, I'm tired of reading about people's lives that I'm not close to. I'm about to lose some friend poundage on facebook. Do I need a yearbook to remember how I knew you? If yes - you are a definite delete. Did I talk to you when I knew you? If no, you're a gonner. Do your posts torture me? Yes - adios amigos. I'm spring cleaning my facebook!

My hubby on the other hand takes a different approach. If you meet his qualifications (and only about 20 of us do...) then you can see everything. If you don't you seee nothing. And chances are, he's ignored what you say!

Such a simple website yet such an influencing force in life. Good luck with your decision!

Holley said...

I often "purge" my friends.
However, because I've moved around so much, I at least have a relationship with some of my old friends from middle school that I probably wouldn't have if I deleted my facebook. People I actually care about having in my life.
I deleted my facebook for a while after college, but now I'm on it every day, which is sad, but I love hearing from my friends.
If I didnt have facebook, there are so many people that I would not hear from - even ones that matter.
Good luck!!

Annie said...

I deleted my facebook over a month ago, and I didn't miss it! But about a week ago I had to go back on to get some contact information for my friends who live in Denmark - and then I got yelled at to never leave again. So instead I went through and deleted A LOT of people. And since I took so much time off, I only go on once a day for about ten minutes. It feels so much better!

Heather said...

I just went through my facebook and deleted 100 friends. I really think I should do it again soon too.

I was surprised by how many of the friends I deleted added me back, almost immediately!

Ruth said...

I have a love/hate with facebook too. I love using it to get together with friends with the events section but sometimes I feel like I'm missing out on actually spending time with people because we talk so much over Facebook! I don't know if I could delete it though...

Modern life is weird...

http://flossyblossom.blogspot.com

everyone calls me bon bon said...

I've had moments of this same thought too. I think I'm keeping it just to hold onto: it's comforting knowing that it's there if I ever want to hop on. I rarely update my status anymore/post pictures/comment. It's just sitting there. In limbo. xoxo

Jenna said...

Oh facebook... I go through phases with it. At one stage I was on it a lot just because I live so far away and like to keep in touch with people. But since I started blogging I maybe go on two or three times a week... I enjoy blogging so much more, the community is great, the material is good, and I feel like I actually get to know people for how they want to be known - Facebook seems so superficial at times.

So I dunno, I will probably just keep mine as a way to stay in touch with people, but outside of that it's really not that important... and there are definitely some people that are really annoying... and that's why I don't link my blog there anymore.

Love your guest post!
xoxo
Jenna

Amanda said...

I totally understand deleting annoying people. I do it constantly. And about three times a year, I'll purge my friend list and delete a bunch of people I don't talk to anymore.

You could always "deactivate" your account, which allows you to "activate" it again, right where you left off. Nothing gets deleted, it just disappears until you activate it again. It might be worth trying, as a trial run.

xox

Megan said...

I think fb is what you want it to be or what you make of it. I find myself sometimes annoyed with certain comments like political/religious rants etc. but at the end, fb gives everyone a chance to share the own unique voice, no matter how annoying it is to some. same goes for blogging. you dont read blogs you dont like, so dont be friends with people you dont, or hide their feed from your page.

being so far away, fb has been amazing for me to keep in contact with friends and family, so i cant ever come down on it.

i would say dont let other peoples things bug u to the point of giving things up that can be beneficial.

Beka said...

definitely time to weed it all out.
i deleted 11 friends one day not too long ago. i love hearing updates from favorite book authors and such, and friends (and some family) who don't live in the state.

and...mostly, i'm on blogs much more than fb; a lot more discussion instead of those random little things that can/won't be too interesting! hah.

Kaitlin Godfrey said...

I've started to delete people I really don't know or haven't seen in ages (you know, the people you became fb friends with freshman yr of college because you thought, "well hey, I might become real friends with them one day"..then you didn't). My husband doesn't have it..not that he used it at all when he did have it. The only thing I like, is seeing baby and wedding pictures sadly...

Jenny said...

I think you had a little post about Lent earlier, but...I'll tell you anyway, haha.

I gave up facebook for Lent and it's been awesome. I am thining of deleting it entirely. The world has not ended since I haven't been on there. I am sad I can't see pictures of my friend in Philly's new baby though. So I am torn too. But it is really nice not worrying about it.

Kristina said...

I deleted mine almost 8 months ago, in fact, my husband and I both did. Neither one of us miss it a bit. At first it was odd because I had to find something else to fill my time with (I was on mine a lot more than the hubby) but I won't be going back. I got a shutterfly for the family to see photos of our life, but that is about it. I was so sick and tired of the drama - AND I had already gone through and deleted a good 100 friends or so. But, I was tired of every move being watched.

For instance - I decided to consolidate my facebook page - take off most my top information - everyone knew I was married, female, blah blah blah.. Then the rumors happened that I was getting a divorce because it was not ON my PROFILE that I was married. Seriously?! Then even more drama happened and it was just plain not worth it. Plus, so many of the people that have facebook seem to be in search of the latest news, drama, blech. No Thanks.

But, for your situation - you have to decide what you want to. Life seems to be a lot more fulfilling without the silly thing. haha. You could always delete it for a little bit and decide you want it then go for it!

Gwen said...

I thought about deleting mine but then I remembered its how I 1. promote my blog and 2. keep in contact with the 9 other girls in my hobby group.

since we have a youtube channel together we also use our facebook to promote our videos.

so while I HATE Facebook with a passion, its the only way to keep in contact with the 9 women I want to keep in contact with because none of them have ever heard of a cellphone..

Rachael said...

Sometimes I think Facebook is kind of stupid, especially the parts where people 'update' what's going on with their lives. Like people really care what you ate for breakfast, you know?
But I do like that I can connect with family and friends on there. To know that, with a click of a button, I can just say Hey. And yes, I could call them too, but to those I don't have their number, this is a good option.
I never write anything on Facebook. Sometimes I 'like' something, but I only log on to see what's happening with other people. That's probably what other people do too. Which may be why everyone's on it!

Rebecca said...

Since Facebook brought in the option of censoring your feed, I've stopped caring so much about what I write there...if people don't like what they read, they can delete me if they aren't so bothered, or they can just quietly hide my feed if they still want to "stalk" me (though why anyone would is beyond me!)

I used to have nearly 200 friends, we were all pretty caught up in it when it first started to become popular. Some were complete strangers who saw my profile (in the days before the tighter privacy options) and noticed I liked the same things as they, some where people I hadn't seen since pre school. Some were work mates who have since become ex workmates, some were people I happened to meet on a night out.

Eventually I found myself trying to arrange social events with my "real" friends and these strangers would be making comments or "liking" statuses about personal things...it began to make me think, why do I need 200 people here? I began to "cull" the list and I've got it down to about 70 people. These are friends from real life (we use FB as a substitute for the phone to save us on a phone bill) family who I don't get to see much of now I live the other side of the country, old, close friends suffering from the same distance, and "acquaintences" whome I cannot delete without our mutual friends getting in a tizz wazz about it or without them being mortally offended.

That said, one by one such people are being "culled". I wait till such a time as is polite to do so...maybe if we havent spoken in over a year...and then discreetly delete them. Or, if they say something I strongly disagree with (even though it has no real effect on me) I tend to use it as an excuse for "early termination". I've found that having trimmed it so well I no longer get so much stress or worry about what strangers will think of me, and a lot less drama is had all round. I also spend much less time on it in general, which is only a good thing!

What really gets me though is the way people get so attached to the fact that you're on their "friends list" even if they couldn't give a cats chance in hell about you in real life. I wish people would lighten up - it's only the internet after all!

Laurita P said...

i totally feel you. i've been having the same urge to delete my facebook for a while now but there are aspects that i do enjoy so i'm reluctant... we'll see

http://adorablydeliciouslp.blogspot.com/

this is me. said...

it's funny because i just posted on my blog a couple of days ago about deleting my facebook account. i don't mind people's status updates (even if they're lame), but it's all the mafia wars, pet society, farm cafe and other apps that they have and bombard my news feed. i also, hate, hate, hate that thing called four-square (or whatever square it is, it's some check-in place) where people have to freakin' check-in and let everyone where they are. really? if you want people to see you or hang with you, call them. i don't need to know what time or day you went to your gym, your salon and some other place. as far as status updates, the most annoying ones (like i said, i don't mind the lame ones) are the jerry springer'esque. you know, like those people who are mad at someone or at the world, and everything is a curse word or they're trying to talk to someone else and are being mean about it. i say call up the person and discuss. anyway, sorry this got too long :) i do like twitter though. it's so simple. it doesn't even have any photo albums.

Married In Chicago said...

Blog reading has almost fully replaced my facebook stalking time. I think I also started to realize that I stopped caring what so and so whom I haven't seen in years did over the weekend. But, I don't want to delete mine because I keep in touch with some family and real friends through it.

If you do the deed, let us know how it goes!

Joelle said...

Wow, people have some strong opinions about Facebook! I'm glad I'm not the only one, though...

I know I shouldn't get as annoyed as I do...it's a personality flaw, I suppose. I just think that not having Facebook in my life would just make life easier, less stressful, I guess. It would be one less thing I have to worry about.


I do agree with all of you that said it's a great way to stay in touch with people, because it really is! I have found childhood friends that I haven't heard from in years. But we're so different now, it doesn't even really matter anymore.

Thanks for your support, though. It shouldn't be such a big deal, obviously, but it is! And I still haven't made my decision. I'll let you know what I decide and how it goes.

I love you all!
Joelle